Monday, 18 November 2013

Off the chest time

Now I know I wear my heart on my sleeve and people can tell how I’m feeling just by looking at me. I’ve suffered this all my life but I think it’s what makes me me.

Now since last week, I’ve been mulling something over in my head and I really need to get it off my chest. It’s to do with human nature and to be honest it’s always annoyed me.

You may know that I come from a showman’s family and as such am part of a close knit community. I spent the formative years of my life settled down in Seaside towns looking after Arcades and Bingos and left home at 20 and went travelling on fairgrounds.

Now what’s bugging me today revolves about a few events that happened to me between the ages of 20 and 21 and were to do with lorries, engines and the like.

Last week, I went to a surprise 50th birthday party for a showman that I’ve known for years. It’s always good to see old friends, and yet I only stayed for around 2 hours and then came home.

Why? Because I’m sick of being reminded of things that happened 30 odd years ago that seem to be all that certain people remember about me. Oh yes it was so funny wasn’t it? Maybe if I was in your shoes, but personally I’m sick of hearing about it. Oh and yes, I love having the mickey taken out of me. It’s one of the joys of my life….yeah sure.

Do you know what? I’ve lived a full life since then and yet they only seem to be able to talk about my mishaps. Now it’s not even that big a thing, but I’ll tell you what, I’ve achieved loads of things since then and what’s more I’ll continue to do so. But to say it doesn't grate would be an understatement.

It’s probably why I tend to keep myself to myself. I’ve always found that people love to take the mickey or run people down. Why is that?

I do believe I’m a sensitive soul at heart, and that makes me vulnerable to certain things, but I like who I am, and don’t feel the need to take the crap anymore.

The funny thing is that the same people who like to remind me of my mishaps, are supposedly the people I’ve always called my friends. I’m beginning to wonder whether I need new ones!

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